Emotions are
something that rules us. All of us have been taken a toll on roller coaster ride
because of our emotions. Sometimes, we have felt extremely enthusiastic and
happy and some times we feel
totally drained and sad. Our emotions are always jumping up and down rapidly.
Emotions are the
ones that build our personal and professional lifestyle. We as human beings,
get easily influenced by the people around us. For example, say you are talking
to someone. If that person responds in an angry tone, then you will also most likely
to respond in a not good manner. On the flip side, if that person is so sweet
and kind, you will mirror them by being sweet and kind. So, our emotions are
hugely influenced by our surroundings and the environment we live in.
Therefore, it is
important to master your emotions so that you will not slip or be influenced by
the behavior of others. You can always continue to be "you" if you
are capable of mastering your emotions. Also, emotions need to be mastered in
order to have a healthy relationship within yourself and the people around you.
Note that emotions are contagious. If you always feel happy, people around you
will also be happy!
1. Identify your emotions
The first step to
change any behavior/emotion is to
identify them. You will not be able to vaguely change or alter any emotions
within you if you do not know the emotion in the first place. So whenever you
feel angry, rage or sadness first identify "What is it really bothering
you?", "Are you really angry? Or is it something else?"
For instance, I get
angry when something bad happens. But in reality, my actual emotion would be
"sadness" or "disappointment". However, I will just assume
that I am angry but the reality was different. Therefore it is extremely important
to identify what you are really feeling!
2. Acknowledge your emotions
Do not misconceive
that mastering your emotions means "ignoring it". The worst thing you
can do to yourself is 'ignoring your emotions'. Understand, that all your
emotions are valid. They are true. Your anger, happiness, tranquility, rage, and
disappointment are all true. Try to acknowledge them. Do not whip yourself for
being angry or sad or depressed. You are a human being and it is totally normal
to feel all these emotions.
If you are feeling
that your sadness or your negative emotion is not valid then I would like to
say that you are fooling yourself. Being honest with your emotions is the true
strength you give to yourself.
3.Pause and reflect
This is something
that I have been preaching for quite a long time now. One single pause at the
time of your raging emotions can create wonders for your mental health. Instead
of ranting out your emotions at the first go itself, try to pause your thinking
and reflect back on it. Ask yourself:
"Why am I
angry?" (your emotion here)
"What is the
use of being angry?"
"I am being
right with my emotion?"
"I am going to
hurt others with my emotion?"
You can go on add
the list of the questions that you need to ask yourself!
4. Get curious about the trigger point
For every emotion, there is a trigger point. Get curious about the trigger point. Ask yourself:
"What made me
angry?" (your emotion here)
"What is the
event that made me feel this rage?"
" What was I
thinking at the time of starting to feel angry?"
"How did my
anger grow?"
"What thoughts
made my anger grow?"
"Who was
responsible for this emotion?"
You can interrogate
yourself as much as you can. Just remember that be positive while exploring
your emotions. Because every emotion is completely valid and it is okay to
feel that way!
5. Rewind and fast forward
This method will
really help you cope up with your emotions. Go back to the time when you have
already felt this emotion and handled it well. Feel the feelings of handling
the emotion quite good. This will give
you a sensation of overcoming the raging emotion. In the same way, fast forward
to the future and imagine yourself handling the emotion perfectly well. This
will improve your mood instantly and let your rage/anger/sadness or whatever emotion cool down.
This exercise is
quite powerful because when we are faced with a challenging emotion we tend to
concentrate more on how we are feeling now and forget all the things around us.
Channeling your present energy to your past and future will let your present problem
cool down a bit.
6. Take Action
Once you have
explored and analyzed your complete emotion. Now, it is time to take action and
easily handle the emotional burden. Prove yourself that you can overcome any
obstacle if you take action to change your emotions!
All the best!
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