Have you ever felt
drained out of energy after being around with certain people?
You usually get
emotionally tired after being with people who possess a gallon of negativity.
They are always
ready with a problem for every solution. People with a negative attitude dwell to
find flaws in others. Also, trying to change them is like stacking on more pain
on us.
They are not going
to change unless and until they first understand that they are so pessimistic.
People with negativity, are so bound into their world of bad vibes that the external world they view has nothing good in it.
You cannot help them
from spreading negativity but you can help yourselves from their pessimistic
behavior.
Below I have
formulated 7 methods that will help you in hand when you need to handle
negative people in your life.
1. Have a hold on your thoughts
I would say that, if
you are affected by someone else's negativity then it is your choice. I mean,
you are choosing to be the prisoner of their attitude.
When you are
surrounded by negative people and get affected by their attitude, you usually
feel angry and frustrated. When you become angry, there are so many
physiological changes happening inside your body. Your adrenaline pumps, your
heart starts beating faster, your breath becomes thicker, your sweat glands get
activated. Do you think someone from outside can do all this to you? Do you
think they possess the magic skills to kindle these many changes in your body?
Well, I believe No.
So, what makes you
angry and frustrated - your thoughts.
Imagine that, you
have solved a critical problem you were working on. You enthusiastically go and
tell your coworker who is a negative person. Now, he starts finding flaws in
your findings, without even appreciating you on your hard work. If you let your
thoughts loose, you might get affected by his comments. You might think "I
should be wrong", "He is a stupid person", "No one is
appreciating my hard work".
Now, what are you
doing here? Giving power to the pessimistic person and his attitude. Instead, I
suggest you have a hold on to your thoughts. Rather than letting negative
people affect you, you can smile and let go of their opinions. This will save a
huge amount of energy.
The point is, don’t
give them the power to affect you.
2. Disarm them by asking
questions
Don't start to argue when someone constantly
complains and always says negative things about you. When you argue, you give
them more power. Since they are already pessimist this will give them more
opportunity to put you down.
Instead, be calm and
ask them questions. If someone says that "You are always late. You are
worthless". Now instead of going into a temper episode. Just pause and ask
them "Ya, I may be late. But, how does that make me worthless". They
may pinpoint some other quality of yours and again say that you are worthless.
Now, you should keep on asking them "How are you concluding that I am
worthless".
Remember, don't lose
your temper. This will only add fuel to their fire. When you keep on
questioning, they would have no reason to qualify their point. Eventually, they
will give up. And you succeed.
3. Have self-confidence
People may doubt you
or put you down. All that would never count in if you have enough
self-confidence to protect you from all those irrelevant comments.
Self-confidence is
the key to go against negative people. When you know what you are capable
of, no matter what others say you will never lose hope.
Only when you lose
your hope all these negative comments affect you. So the most positive way to
defend yourself is by saying nothing - because you know that you are going to
make it no matter what others say.
4. See the bright side
For every situation,
there are two sides. One is the optimistic side and the other is the
pessimistic side.
People who are going
to complain and judge others will always see the pessimistic side. They will
not even know that there is another side because they are so occupied and
comfortable in mourning and finding flaws.
Now, you have to
just look for the bright side in any situation. It is not hard. It is just a matter of fact that you need to understand that you have a choice to take the
positive from any situation.
Even if someone says
bad about you, just take it as constructive criticism. Every person has a
lesson for you, even the worst. So when you keep looking for the bright side,
you are always gonna find it.
5. Ignore
Ignore their
comments because you have no means to prove anyone. The only person who needs
to be satisfied and happy with what you are doing is YOU.
Be true to yourself
enough that the other people's opinion is nothing but a cloud of useless dust. Ignore
their comments because you know yourself more. You are the only person that
knows you completely.
Do you want to let
the opinion of someone who does not even know you completely bother you?
6. Set emotional boundaries
It is very important
to say 'NO' in the place where you don't feel like doing something.
If you don't want to
go to the party because you know they are a bunch of complainers, then don’t
go. If you don't want to do something. Then don’t do it. See, you cannot make
everyone happy. You cannot.
Always, maintain an
emotional distance from people who are not good for your mind. Don’t give in to
their suggestions, if you feel something is not right then tell it.
And again, don’t try
to change anyone. It is not going to be useful at all. So always mind your
business and mind.
7. Do not be the victim
People who are bound
with negative thoughts not only tell negative things they also suck us into
their pessimistic world.
Do not spend time
with people who are always complaining, because there are a lot of chances
that you will also start being negative as they are.
Do not be the victim
of their negative attitude. Protect yourself from negative people. Because
there is much to enjoy in life, that pessimistic people are missing. Make sure
you don’t miss any.
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