Fear is confusing.
It sometimes saves us while most of the time it dumps us. When you are in a
life-threatening situation, it is the feeling of fear that creates adrenaline
and also instructs your brain to pump more oxygen to save your life. But this
is only in life-threatening times. What if you are scared to face the public?
What if you fear failure and give up? Then here comes the part where you
really need to face your fears and
conquer it in a non-traumatizing manner.
Our minds are
habitual creatures. It loves routine. So when you do something out of the
routine it fears the change. It creates an adrenaline rush and will stop you
from breaking your routine cycle, even to add something that supports your goal.
Fear is dangerous for success. Having some amount of fear is ok, what is
not ok is to be feared all the time and leave opportunities fade in front of
your eyes.
Don’t fear about
what you can't control
Most of us are prone
to overthinking. Overthinking is a result of fear. Also, we fear things we
can't even control. For example, The corona pandemic. Do you think as an
individual you can control the spread? Not possible right. But, what we do we
fear so much about it. Obviously, the situation will trigger us to be scared.
But ask yourself, what can control about the situation? You can stay safe at
home, stay clean and hygienic, take all the precautions and protect your
family. Apart from this, you have no control over this situation. So, it is
preferably good to not fear. If you are precautious it means you are already in
the safe zone. There is no need to have anxiety attacks and panic attacks. This
too shall pass.
Evaluate fears
Before setting on to
any task or goal always evaluate what is the worst that can happen in the given
situation. I am not asking you to be pessimistic, I am just asking you to be
precautious. Unfortunately, if the situation turns bad, evaluate if you can handle
the situation properly. Also, have an action plan to activate at the time of
crisis. By doing this, you will have confidence that even if you face any
problems you will have a way out. You will not be stuck in fear and lose your
vision/mission.
For example, let's
say you start a small business and you are setting out for your first sale. And
this sale did not go as per your wish. If you like most of the people, you may
think of giving up or you may feel that you have done a mistake by putting your
all energy into starting this business. But, actually, if you have already
evaluated the worst side of the sales, you might bring in a new and most
effective strategy to hike the sales at the time of crisis. You are not stuck
here, you just took a diverse route.
Imagine the
alternative
Fear always pushes
us to think on the worst side. What if I lose? What if everyone laughs at me?
What if I fail? So change the pattern of your thoughts by changing your 'what
if' questions. Ask yourself, what if I win? What if everyone appreciates me? And
so on.
Imagine that you
have to give an important presentation tomorrow in front of the clients. This
is really a milestone for your career and company. But, the night before all
the negative fears start creeping in. You imagine all the worst possibilities
of you forgetting a sentence/ stammering/ not delivering well. When such
thoughts start to ponder your imagination you should change the course of your
thoughts very fast. Remember, you decide where your energy flows. You have to
bring a state change here and redirect your thoughts to positive daydreaming of
all the success you about get through delivering the presentation right.
Try consulting a
therapist
All the fears I
talked before are curable by yourself. But there are some fears which are known
as phobias which cannot be easily cured without the help of a therapist. If you
have a specific phobia, you may not be able to conquer your fears on your own.
If your fears are debilitating, or you aren’t having much success facing them
on your own, seek professional help.
Treatment may
involve talking about the thing that scares you, practicing relaxation
strategies, and managing your anxiety as you face your fears head-on. A
therapist, however, will help you go at a pace that is comfortable and healthy
for you.
Never avoid fear
While
avoiding the situations you fear might make you feel better in the short term,
this behavior can cause anxiety in the long term. When you completely avoid
your fears, you teach your amygdala (the fear center in your brain) that you
can't handle them.
Ideally,
you need to gradually face your fears, in small doses that don't overwhelm you,
until your fear subsides. This will "habituate" your amygdala, or let
your brain become accustomed to the fear.
According
to a study published in the journal Science,
the brain has to experience repeated exposure to fear in order to get over it.
Researchers placed rodents in a small box and gave them a mild shock. Then,
over a long period, they place the same rodents in a box without administering
shocks. At first, the mice froze but with repeated exposure, they were able to
relax
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