Let's be realistic,
failure is inevitable. Every single person in this world would have faced
failure at one point.
Failure also sucks
. Every one of us wants to succeed in life. We work hard to achieve.
And when we fail to attain the goal it is natural to get depressed over the loss.
However, the power
lies within the pain. Anyone who is extremely obsessed with their goal, will
not fear failure. As said, failure is inevitable. So there is no use in fearing
over failure. Moreover, failure is an indication that you are on the right path.
The real commitment
for the goal depends on how fast you bounce back from failure and get going
with all that you have to achieve that desire that you have set your eye on.
1. Learning
Failure is an
immense bundle of learning. If you have never failed it means that you have
never learned anything. If you fail at something search for the lessons it
taught you.
- What did you learn?
- What are the mistakes you made?
- How can you improvise your plan?
- What is the most important lesson you learned?
- How will this failure help you in the future?
When you look for
the lessons in failure you will accumulate wide knowledge and you will also have
a chance to improvise yourself for a better future.
2. Develop a growth mindset
Developing a growth
mindset will help you combat the pressure of failure in an efficient manner.
The main motto of a growth mindset is "There is no failure, only
feedback".
When you have a mindset were every failure you encounter is nothing but feedback to improve
yourself then you will be able to bounce back from the grievance of failure
really soon.
In a growth mindset,
there is no success or failure, there is only "learning". When you
are focused on learning and becoming the better version of yourself then
failure will not be hurdle it will only be a stepping stone.
3. Learn from people who failed
Whenever you feel
depressed because of a rejection or a failure, then look around. You will find
so many living examples of how people turned the pain of failure to fuel the
power towards success.
Remember the famous
J.K Rowling - the author of the Harry Potter series. She was rejected 12 times
before she published her first novel. Oprah Winfrey was a failure when she came
into the television industry, Bill Gates was considered a failure.
All the famous
people on the earth have faced failure in their life. They all bounced back
from it worked hard consistently to become the person they are now.
4. Patience
You have to
understand that there is nothing called an overnight success. If it is an
overnight success then it will be short-lived.
Learn to have a long term view.
Build escape plans in case of failure. Understand that you may not be
successful in one shot. You will have to work hard and be consistent.
Most people give up as soon as they fail once.
What would have
happened if bill gates or Orpah or JKR had thought that they are a failure and
gave up after the first failure?
Patience and
consistency is the much-needed element in anyone's success. When you learn to
be patient about your failures then you will be able to bounce back from the
failure easily and keep going.
5. Positive self-talk
It is important that
you do not beat yourself after a failure. It is easy for us to get into
negative self-talk and curse ourselves once we have failed. But remember, it
will only increase the intensity of the loss you are feeling. It is not going to
help you in easing your pain in any way.
The only one who can
help you come out of the pain of failure is you. So, always talk good things to
yourself.
Your mind hears you
more than it hears anyone else. Therefore be careful about how you talk to
yourself. Be kind to you. Failure is just a part of life, it is not life
itself.
6. List down your previous
successes
It is easy for us to
think negatively in case of any failure. When you think negatively your focus
will always be on the negative things. You will recall all your failures and
grieve over each and everything. Therefore, it is important to redirect your attention
to success. List down all the successes that you have had all your
life. This will help you understand that you are not someone who constantly
fails. The list can be as simple as:
- Every time you have taken courage and put yourself out there
- Each time you have given your best
- Small Awards and recognitions you have got
- Each time you pushed yourself forward
- Every time your loved ones loved your work
- Every time you made someone smile
7. You are not your failure
Mostly, we equate
ourselves to failure. Once we have failed or lost in something then we say that
"I am a failure". This statement is completely untrue. No one is a
total failure. Rather than labeling ourselves
as a failure, we need to address the
failure. You can say something like "I lost a job", "I lost an
exam". This gives a chance for the mind to consider other options.
8. It is ok to be sad
Bouncing back from
failure does not mean that you have to jump in joy once you have failed. It is
ok to grieve over your failure. The truth is failure is depressing. You have to
accept the fact that you can be sad over it. But the thing is set a time limit
for recovering back.
Maybe you want two
days to be sad or a week or even a month! It totally depends on how much you
are affected by the failure. However, the important thing is the time limit of
your recovery. It is ok to be sad but it is not ok to be depressed for a very long
time. If you are depressed over failure for a very long time, then it is time
to seek help. Talk to a counselor or hire a coach to move forward in your life.
All the best!
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