How to let go to live a more growth oriented and peaceful life?

Most of us think that happiness lies in accumulating the positive. We try to set out for a voyage to find a better life while carrying a bag of unwanted sorrows with us. No matter how far we go in search of happiness, we will never find it until and unless we let go of our bag of sorrow.

"Letting go" is more easy said than done. It is a very simple way to have a happy mind yet a very powerful one.

Letting go is not forgetting a painful memory, it is not just erasing something from your mind. Letting go does not work like that.

Trying to forget or erase a memory will not work most often. Because, you will actually not forget the memory but you will suppress it. Suppressing a negative thought might be a relief for the short term. But, in the long run it is obviously a problem.

So, most effective and efficient way to live a happy life is not in avoiding the negative but in letting go of it.

Letting go is nothing but not giving your power to that feeling. For example, if you are threatened by someone in the past and you still hold a grudge on them, you can let go by forgiving them. Stop giving power to thoughts and people to control you.

One more important point is that 'letting go' does not mean you are weak. It actually means you are strong and powerful. You need so much courage to let go.

When you hold a grudge against someone or if you have a negative feeling always bringing you down then it means that you are stuck with your life. You are not moving on with your life. You are being too hard on yourselves. 

Stop beating yourself up because of the past. You deserve more power in your life. To gain back your power, all that you have to do is let go.

1. Empathy

When you develop empathy, you will find it easier to let go of grudges and vengeance. Because, the basic concept of empathy is to understand the other person.  To think like them and feel like them.

First, understand that each and every person in this world is unique. No one has to accept your values and vice versa. So stand in their shoes and understand why they did what they did to you. How would they be thinking when cheating on you? When threatening you?

Understand their side of righteousness. Every situation/experience you undergo has a positive side to it. Anything at all. So, look at it and understand their motive.

2. Questions

The power of questions is always underestimated. The way you question yourself can bring profound clarity to you.

When you are keeping on holding on to a negative feeling, it basically becomes like a part of your body and you may find it or at least think that it is impossible to give away that feeling. You might have created your identity around that feeling.

When you catch yourself at this point in life. Then ask questions to yourself.

Ask, "What is that I am holding on?", "What is that I have to let go to lead a peaceful life?", "What is that is stopping me from letting go?", "How is this negative feeling serving the purpose of my life?" , "Should I hold on to this negative feeling", "if no, why?", "If yes, why?"

These are some of the questions you can ask yourself. You might come up with your own set of questions too :)

3. Exercises

There are a lot of exercises you can do to let go. These exercises might leave you light and calm after doing it. Some of the exercises are

• Write down what you want to let go in a paper or a hydrogen balloon. And then, hold it and think all the negative feelings that one thing has given to you. Imagine that you are transferring all these thoughts and emotions into that paper/ balloon. Now let that float away in the air and disappear. This would give relief to my mind. For example, if I am holding on to a past abusive relationship. Then I write, "Past abusive relationship and the mental torture I underwent" in the balloon/paper and then I will let it fly.

• Meditation - Meditation is the go-to exercise to calm your mind and free your thoughts. Just 5 minutes of meditation might help you so much.

                                              

• Guided meditation - This one has worked 'WOW' for me and has left me in tears. Guided meditation will really help you unload the sorrow bag on your shoulders and it will ease your pain.

These are some of the ways you can actually let go of what is holding you from becoming your highest potential. Letting go is a must if you wanted to grow ahead in your life.