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The secret of happy couples!


Do you sometimes wonder seeing couples who are happily married for years and stay the same always? I do. I think "How in the world, two people can be married like 50 years together?", "Won't they fight?", "Won't they have disagreements?". I always wonder about how relationships last. I was having a fixed minded outlook towards relationship until I came across how to be a growth-minded individual in a relationship to make it last longer. I also came to the conclusion that no matter how many differences couples have, the love - if it is real, it is worth all the imperfections and effort.

Below are some of the tips I got from healthy long-lasting couples to live a beautiful life together

1. Communicate

     Lack of communication is the number one reason why relationships don't last. You have to communicate what and how you feel to your partner. Or else, nothing would change. No one can read your mind and understand what is going through. You have to talk about it for yourself. Talking it out does not mean yelling. Yelling is not communicating.

     You have to listen to your partner's position without interrupting him or her. You have to then summarize what they have said, even if you don't agree. And then you have to tell how you feel like and what the problem is.

     Also, just talking about the problem will not solve it. Sit and talk to each other to drive a compatible solution to the problem. 

2. Be Realistic

     Every relationship will be a roller-coaster ride of excitement and fun at the beginning. But gradually, it will become blunt. All days will not be sunny and full of lilies.  You will have to accept the fact that there will be rainy days and days where you would not enjoy each other's company.

    You must digest the fact that your "Honeymoon" period of a year or two has ended and it is the real showtime. You have to start being realistic to travel in a long term relationship.

3. Spend quality time together

    You have to spend time together without interruptions. Have a day in a week for being together. Not just watching a movie or playing games together, just go for a walk together or do chores together. Be with each other and be for each other.

4. Work on the relationship

    Most of them think that if they have to work on a relationship, it means that something is seriously wrong with their relationship. Maintaining a long-lasting relationship isn't natural. It requires effort. You have to understand each other. There will be misunderstandings and ego clashes. But, you have to put your relationship beyond everything that is pulling y'all down. Good relationships require work obviously.

5. Don't try to change your partner

     If both you and your partner stop trying to change each other, you will eliminate the source of most of your arguments. Stop complaining about how your partner is not up to your expectations and try to be grateful for all that they are. Once, you stop complaining, your partner will automatically follow what you are saying or will at least try to improvise themselves for the love on you.

6. Give their space

    Enjoying their own company and doing what they love is as important as spending time together. There should be no restrictions and boundaries in a relationship. Love should liberate people not cut their wings. Let your partner do whatever he or she wishes to. If you genuinely feel that what they are up to is not good for the family and themselves, just let them know in a polite manner. If they have a real love for you and your words, they would obviously obey you.

7. Embrace differences

      At the beginning of every relationship, you feel 'one' with your partner because you both might like the same things or talk about the same topics. But, as days go by you might find so many differences between you both. If he or she is different from you, it does not mean that you have to fight for it. Just accept who they are and be with those differences. All of us in the world need to be accepted. Just by embracing their differences, you learn more about them. You might probably fall in love with those imperfections and differences too :)

8. Be Honest

     Honesty is the most important trait of being in a relationship. All the above points make no sense if you are not honest with each other. If you are in a genuine relationship it is never hard, to be honest. 
     The happiest couples are the ones where honesty is as natural and every day as breathing.

9. Respect each other

    Treat your partner with respect and you will get the same respect in return. Respect their choices and the way of doing things. Say "Thank you" often and be grateful to each other. Appreciate your partners work and effort he or she put in to do any task. Be supportive of all the ventures they take and be their best friend!

May your life fill with best moments!

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